why is it so hard
to squeeze in a word
from time to time
proficiency nullified
when faced with reality
of someone to pine
over, just like that
heartbroken and alone
and fears redefine
what if my lips are shut
suffering alone forever
will you then be mine
it’s been too long to count
the days of my love for you
immovable through stormy life
yet unrequited throughout
my use to you was to be used
for your whims were my commands
only to be discarded after
like stale news of old yester
at least you could’ve hated me
i would’ve cherished the vehemence
all i could see was indifference
unworthy to elicit an emotion
your essence gone
all that’s left behind
lingering aroma
plans made to perfection
only to be looked back upon
as broken promises
a hand extended to help
only for a swift retraction
to let plunge in darkness
a heart let go for someone
only to be crushed into pieces
never to be one again
withdrawn from the world
alone for a long quest
inhibited and furled
thriving on my own zest
inundated as solitude hurled
never felt such unrest
geared for a life whirled
fear thumping neath chest
optimistic yet curled
rational, yet with unrest
yearning for love swirled
one day it will attest
until then, my world…
betrayed by my own kith
over faces unknown
and years of love and trust
puff… gone
my existence to you a ghost
or a plane parallel
treatment to me so silent
shivered universe all
the darkness in you i see
i am not a match
walking around you on eggshells
can’t let those chicken hatch
the rampant betrayal of self
is it really worth it
or do you think i’ll take you back
lack of esteem
you should’ve just conveyed
what was in your heart
instead you chose to string mine
till it broke in millions
now i rage not for the hurt
but for the future we could’ve had
if it weren’t for your delusions
thinking it was just a game
nah… i’ve endured enough for you
no more shall i come to your rescue
a toy to play with and then
shove it under the bed
discarded. disposed off
away from any living gaze
while you roam around with
someone else
catering to every whims of
this creature
and i endure…
pain… regret… loss.
only for you to come back with
tears to soak my shirt
and me to just be happy while
i cry… i shout… i tremble…
to blind eyes and deaf ears
no more
this, here is when
i let you go
this, here, is when
i take a stand
this, here, is when
i become free!
why are there so many sleepless nights
is the thought of you keeping me awake
the way you moved, the way you smiled
nah! i’m over you, i just slept all morning
