I do feel lost at times. Lost, beyond belief. Nothing makes sense and the world feels like an unwarranted duplicitous burdensome place. I feel the need to ask questions and yet I don’t because I’m afraid of the answers. Where is my life taking me? Is there such a thing as fate? How can I even give credence to this unscientific curiosity? I guess I’m just going through the motions of life with blended days and never ending nights. I do try to get myself out of this feeling. Alas! No avail. Every time I see water on the road, it turns out to be a reflection… never ending story of my life!
Erratic Thoughts # 55
Sometimes I wonder if the job of a night is just to make you realize what a colossal failure you have been!
bliss
so blinded by the popping colors
now blind to reality
a wish for truth can’t be granted
falsehood is the currency
and on we go, ignorance multiplied
averting truth left and right
all i care that my ego is satisfied
so what if i run away from a fight
Erratic Thoughts # 54
It’s bound to happen someday… The tethered notion of being stuck in the same place. Same days. Same nights. And yet all you can do, it seems, is to wake up and go on…
quatrain # 11
i hope the beginning never ends
i hope the end never begins
for the journey this life sends
is where i wash away my sins
smile – why?
never has there been a reason to smile
just widening parting lips is good too
my mind expects me to look happy
what broken soul? a fake laugh will do
empty bottles
i feel guilt, breaking
my own promises
and yet my feet drag me
to unwanted destination
everyday, every night
promises made anew
and lies to fight
that gut feeling inside
yet my feet go on
towards an untoward
for i lack a mirror
to reflect upon my deeds
beholden
i am being watched
through the annals of time
befitting, it seems
that i’m stuck in the present
for past has already
tarnished itself through me
and the future appears just
to tease before disappearing
i am beholden to time
enough to be imprisoned forever
and yet free to feel
my failures over and over
Empty
It’s so easy to judge everyone around you just by an off handed impression you have of them. Even I am not immune to this. Yet, I stick to those impressions just because it is easy.
Life doesn’t turn out the way you want. But, you can still work towards it. Unfortunately, for everyone else whose life isn’t turning at all, or even moving anywhere, dreams become a luxury. An oasis away from the perils of this wretched world.